It wasn’t just that the church counseling staff was over its head; at times, their well-meaning efforts unintentionally made things worse in some cases. That experience led me to write a book titled: Finding Tom. This isn’t a pitch for the book, but rather a reflection on what I discovered while writing it: countless others—both men and women—shared similar stories of seeking help from their faith-based communities and feeling let down.

In our parents’ generation, church staff were often the go-to for counseling services. This approach was built on trust, shared faith, and the belief that spiritual leaders could offer biblically grounded wisdom and emotional support. And while I FIRMLY believe Christ should be the foundation of any strong marriage and scripture often points us towards the truth that’s often missing in our lives or relationships—and while church leaders can often play a meaningful role in assisting us in these areas—most pastors are not equipped with clinical assessment skills or professional training to address complex relational dynamics or issues like trauma, mental health, and addiction. These challenges oftentimes require professional expertise. Additionally, many individuals choose not to seek counseling from their home congregation, due to embarrassment or fear of the integrity of church leadership leaking their issues to other members of the church.

Yet, many Christians and pastors still believe churches should be the sole providers of marital or individual counseling. Today, fewer pastors receive formal training in counseling, and many are hesitant to refer members to licensed professionals. I believe the solution lies in collaboration: faith and professional care working hand in hand.

My passion is to create a central hub of resources for couples, families, and churches—offering guidance on common pitfalls often overlooked by both church and professional counseling.

-God Bless